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About Tilburg

Escort’s quirky, innit? Little-known fact: first ones rolled out ‘68, Ford tryna flex on British roads. Had this boxy vibe, not sleek like Joaquin’s AI lass in *Her*— “I’m yours and I’m not yours,” she’d say to it, ha! Me fave’s the Mark IV, tho—turbo version, zippy little bugger! Once saw a lad soup one up, neon lights, loud as a warg—surprised me guts out! Thought, “Sméagol needs that!” But nah, me bank account’s a sad hobbit hole. Still, Escort’s cheap thrill—parts everywhere, like goblin loot! Not like them fancy Teslas, all “oooh, I’m electric”—piss off, posh twats!

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So, I cast my line into the water near the Kollumerpomp. I’m feeling good, you know? The fish are biting, and I’m thinking, “Today’s gonna be a good day.” But then, I hear this loud honking. I look up, and it’s a bunch of geese. Like, a whole squad of them just waddling down the street like they own the place. I’m trying to focus, but these geese are just strutting around like they’re on a runway. I’m cracking up, but also kinda annoyed. Can’t a fisherman catch a break?

A Conversation With The 'World's Tallest Elf'